My Year of 100 Family Dinners Week 45:

Why We Keep Sitting Down Together; Even When It’s Hard

This week was the quiet stretch before Thanksgiving break and somehow, it felt heavier than I expected.

The kids had a light school week. As a former educator, I struggle with how little meaningful learning happens right before a holiday. As a mom, I’ll be honest: I wasn’t exactly excited about an 11-day Thanksgiving break.

Before the break started, I spoke with our neurologist, and we made the decision to change my son’s medication. With that, we chose to stay home for Thanksgiving and begin the medication change on the first day of break. It felt like the safest, most grounded decision we could make.

On the very last day of school before vacation, my son had a seizure at school.

That night, we added the new medication.

Watching Siblings Grow Closer

Through all of this, my daughter has been incredible.

I know parents aren’t supposed to gush too much about their kids, but I’m going to anyway. She has been the most supportive sister. Calm. Steady. Present. She shows up quietly, without needing praise, and offers exactly what her brother needs.

They will never admit to being closer.

But I see it.

I’d like to think that sitting down together night after night has something to do with that.

Five Dinners, Five Chances to Connect

We had five family dinners this week.

My son is not loving it. Honestly, he’s not loving much right now and that makes sense. Every night, he asks why we’re sitting down together. Every night, I answer the same way:

Because I love you, and I want to spend time with you.

I make him put his phone away. He grumbles. He sighs. He makes it very clear that he would rather be anywhere else.

And then, almost every night, something shifts.

He starts listening.He starts talking.He gets engaged.

And just like that, he forgets he didn’t want to be there at all.

My daughter is different. She sits down easily. Eats. Listens. Chats. Offers quiet support. I think this is one of the ways she’s holding her brother, by helping us stay connected as a family.

One night this week, she spent the evening giggling with me. Talking. Joking. Laughing in that loose, unguarded way parents hope for with their teens. Those moments are rare and they’re gold.

I will remember that night forever.

That’s the goal.

Why Family Dinner Matters (Especially for Mental Health)

There’s a reason I keep insisting on these dinners; even when it’s uncomfortable.

Research consistently shows that regular family meals are linked to better mental health outcomes for kids and teens. Studies from sources like the American Academy of Pediatrics and Harvard’s Family Dinner Project have found that kids who regularly eat with their families tend to:

• experience lower rates of anxiety and depression

• show better emotional regulation

• engage in less risky behavior

• feel a stronger sense of belonging and stability

Family dinner doesn’t have to be perfect. It doesn’t have to be long. It doesn’t even have to involve home-cooked food.

What matters is predictable connection, a moment where kids know they’ll be seen, heard, and held in relationship. Especially during seasons of medical uncertainty, emotional overwhelm, or change, that consistency becomes a protective factor.

Even when they push back.

Maybe especially when they push back.

The Heart of This Week

This week reminded me why I started this journey.

Dinner isn’t about the food.It’s not about manners or conversation topics or checking a box.It’s about showing up again and again and saying, you matter enough for me to stop everything else.

Five dinners.Five chances to connect.Five moments of resistance that softened into presence.

We’re entering a long break. We’re starting a medication change. Things feel uncertain but around the table, even briefly, we are steady.

And that matters more than anything.